In a pretty heated 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court has agreed to release thousands of prisoners, due to lack of medical care that amounted to an eighth amendment violation.
For a general background, and some context, check here.
Scratch that- THOUSANDS OF EIGHTH AMENDMENT VIOLATIONS.
I'll provide all the legal briefs at the end of the post, but please trust my representation- California State Prisons are severely lacking in providing health care to inmates who desperately need to be treated for a variety of ailments. It'll be supported by the attached references, but it's also something that I've witnessed firsthand by doing a few years' work of prison advocacy. I've dealt with clients who suffered infections that stemmed from a tooth ache that wasn't responded to for weeks, even after the appropriate medical request was sent in.
And, if you have an opportunity to read in to this further, I suggest you read the case that really served as the catalyst for the SCOTUS ruling: Plata v. Schwarzenegger. It makes the "Saw" horror movie franchise look like an episode of "Family Matters."
So, what did our highest court rule on. Here is the holding:
"1)The court below did not err in concluding that overcrowding in California prisons was the “primary” cause of the continuing violations of prisoners’ constitutional rights to adequate health care. 2) The evidence supported the conclusion of the three-judge panel that a population limit was necessary to remedy the overcrowding problem. 3) The relief ordered by the three-judge court – the population limit –was narrowly drawn, extended no further than necessary to correct the violation, and was the least intrusive means necessary to correct the violation."
Source: SCOTUS blog
I haven't had an opportunity to read Scalia's dissent, but with my hand over my crystal ball, I envision that he finds this ruling to be an activist overreaching overstepping of the constitution.
I, however, see it differently. The violations outlined in Plata, supra, were so blatant that the prison health care system was placed in to federal receivership, which basically means that the feds assume control until the problem is solved. With the three judge panels' decision to release inmates affirmed by the Supremes, we effectuate the goal of not only providing better care to those incarcerated, but also relieving the tax payer of an insurmountable burden.
Allow me to address a couple of misguided arguments that I have heard all-too-often when discussing this issue:
1. Who cares what treatment we give these guys? They should be PUNISHED, not given medical care!
Yes, yes, inmates in the CDC with rare exception of a few are guilty of crimes. Hell, some of them are pretty ugly crimes. And yes, within our own Penal Code, it's very clear that the purpose of incarceration is to "punish." But here's the key: even if you had no desire of even trying to rehabilitate inmates that might be amenable to such treatment, the United States Constitution kinda provides a floor for heinous treatment. I don't really want to get in to the gruesome details of prison health care, so if you're hesitant, go ahead and reread Plata.
2. Release thousands of inmates?! But they'll move next door, drive down property values, rape and pillage, and spit in my combo burrito at Taco Bell!
People are naturally reticent to 35,000 prisoners being released back to society. However, as the SCOTUS noted, their decision to release was "narrowly tailored" to the constitutional harm, and I guarantee you all that all inmates released will be nonviolent offenders. How can I assure that? BECAUSE CALIFORNIA HAS A NASTY TENDENCY TO INCARCERATE THOUSANDS OF NONVIOLENT OFFENDERS, OFTEN DUE TO SUBSTANCE ABUSE ISSUES! By jettisoning these folks, it serves two ends, hopefully. Again, it will provide an opportunity for the CDC to comply with the fucking eighth amendment. Also, it may alleviate some of the taxes that it costs to keep a person in prison. Trust me, in most cases, especially those involving chronic medical problems, it's cheaper to send your kid to Stanford.
There's a lot more to be discussed on this matter, and as it unfolds, I'll do my best to opine. Suffice it to say, though, I am happy with the Court, and most notably the moderate swing vote Kennedy.
Sources:
SCOTUS BLOG
CDC(R)
A Cat Massaging A Dog
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
$hortcomings...
I'd like to think of myself as a relatively intelligent guy- I have a professional degree, I know how many chromosome pairs the normal human should be, and hell, I'm responsible for calculating the tab when I eat with coworkers (ok, this last one is b/c we're all unbelievably math-averse, with me being the one willing to enter digits in to a calculator.)
So it comes as no surprise that when that bravado is challenged, I naturally get defensive. So, generally, I try to be as honest with myself about all my shortcomings.
The one that I have a hard time owning up to, however? PERSONAL FINANCES.
I know it's lame, but I have all these romanticized notions of my maternal grandfather, who, as the accumulated stories would indicate, was reckless with money. As in would just spend on whatever. I think I try to emulate that sometimes, either subconsciously or otherwise, without realizing the following:
1. My saint of a grandmother was likely pulling her hair out and making sure that bills were paid and my mother and her siblings were clothed and fed.
2. He made considerably more than I do.
I also think that I grew up in an era where it was easy to leverage things like equity in your home and accumulate a lot of debt. I'm certainly not saying that this justifies or excuses my behavior, I'm just trying to pinpoint where my lack of financial acumen originates.
And with the help from people that are much more savvy with their finances, including someone who was able to buy a house in her twenties and still do awesome things, I've decided that for my future sanity I need to be more proactive.
Which leads me to my plug for the day:
Mint.com
Mint.com is a website that takes your financial information, including how and where you spend your money, and does it's best to budget for you, and make recommendations, including recommendations based on goals. It's totally free, and totally helpful for those that get weighed down in the details.
I've just started, and with the full knowledge that an "app" won't solve all my financial debts, I am excited to start to be better about moola, so that maybe someday I can appear to be reckless with money, and still have a comfortable amount stored away.
So it comes as no surprise that when that bravado is challenged, I naturally get defensive. So, generally, I try to be as honest with myself about all my shortcomings.
The one that I have a hard time owning up to, however? PERSONAL FINANCES.
I know it's lame, but I have all these romanticized notions of my maternal grandfather, who, as the accumulated stories would indicate, was reckless with money. As in would just spend on whatever. I think I try to emulate that sometimes, either subconsciously or otherwise, without realizing the following:
1. My saint of a grandmother was likely pulling her hair out and making sure that bills were paid and my mother and her siblings were clothed and fed.
2. He made considerably more than I do.
I also think that I grew up in an era where it was easy to leverage things like equity in your home and accumulate a lot of debt. I'm certainly not saying that this justifies or excuses my behavior, I'm just trying to pinpoint where my lack of financial acumen originates.
And with the help from people that are much more savvy with their finances, including someone who was able to buy a house in her twenties and still do awesome things, I've decided that for my future sanity I need to be more proactive.
Which leads me to my plug for the day:
Mint.com
Mint.com is a website that takes your financial information, including how and where you spend your money, and does it's best to budget for you, and make recommendations, including recommendations based on goals. It's totally free, and totally helpful for those that get weighed down in the details.
I've just started, and with the full knowledge that an "app" won't solve all my financial debts, I am excited to start to be better about moola, so that maybe someday I can appear to be reckless with money, and still have a comfortable amount stored away.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
The Gods Must Be Crazy
First, allow me to apologize for the debacle below. I don't know what happened to the format of the blog below, and I apologize for the ridiculousness.
I've been thinking a lot lately about random topics to rant about- celebrities, people that piss me off, things that I've been enjoying (as in my new and awesome iPad), beers I've been drinking, etc., et. al.
But then I was walking back the block from court to my office and I couldn't help but notice about 7 homeless folks with clear-cut Axis I disorders that should not be on the streets to fend for themselves.
And of these 6 or 7 folks, I personally have represented 4 of them in criminal matters. Matters which they were arrested for being homeless. And no, I'm not being a bleeding heart or activist for saying this; they were literally just out, and were homeless.
Ever since my second year of law school I have been fascinated with the cross section of jurisprudence and psychological issues. Not guilty by reason of insanity, competency to stand trial, factors in mitigation in sentencing- they were all theoretical and philosophical issues that were fun to play around with.
But now, slightly jaded by a year of this work, I am of the opinion that criminal courts, at least in counties with no resources for the mentally ill, do absolutely nothing to help those in need. To a large extent, it's not their fault; there are simply no resources for the court to utilize in order to assist a criminal defendant with mental health issues.
But here's where things get convoluted. Courts will routinely order someone to go, on their own, and make and keep an appointment with county Mental Health to address their behavior. Which, when you really think, is unbelievably short-sighted. Assuming the defendant does have significant mental health issues, it's not paternalistic to assume that they simply do not have the resources to maintain appointments. And they don't. And then, when they don't show up to court, they are faced with further consequences that only serve as a drain on the court system. Probation violations are filed, bench warrants issued, which is frankly a bazooka firing at an ant hill. What's more ridiculous, is county mental health, like some other behavioral programs here in this county, are self reporting. So, if a crazy person goes there, and as is routinely the case, feels that they are perfectly sane, they are taken at their word. Viewing it cynically (which is nearly impossible to do otherwise), it's a cost-saving tactic to prevent providing services for those who may actually benefit.
I wish I had an answer that incorporated getting help to those who needed it, and ensured that they were able to easily access those services. Other, more affluent, counties do have mental health courts, which if appropriately staffed with personnel and the right mindset, can have a profound impact. But I suppose it all depends on the almighty dollar. Hopefully, money will begin to trickle again, even in the more rural counties, and people can get the help they deserve.
I've been thinking a lot lately about random topics to rant about- celebrities, people that piss me off, things that I've been enjoying (as in my new and awesome iPad), beers I've been drinking, etc., et. al.
But then I was walking back the block from court to my office and I couldn't help but notice about 7 homeless folks with clear-cut Axis I disorders that should not be on the streets to fend for themselves.
And of these 6 or 7 folks, I personally have represented 4 of them in criminal matters. Matters which they were arrested for being homeless. And no, I'm not being a bleeding heart or activist for saying this; they were literally just out, and were homeless.
Ever since my second year of law school I have been fascinated with the cross section of jurisprudence and psychological issues. Not guilty by reason of insanity, competency to stand trial, factors in mitigation in sentencing- they were all theoretical and philosophical issues that were fun to play around with.
But now, slightly jaded by a year of this work, I am of the opinion that criminal courts, at least in counties with no resources for the mentally ill, do absolutely nothing to help those in need. To a large extent, it's not their fault; there are simply no resources for the court to utilize in order to assist a criminal defendant with mental health issues.
But here's where things get convoluted. Courts will routinely order someone to go, on their own, and make and keep an appointment with county Mental Health to address their behavior. Which, when you really think, is unbelievably short-sighted. Assuming the defendant does have significant mental health issues, it's not paternalistic to assume that they simply do not have the resources to maintain appointments. And they don't. And then, when they don't show up to court, they are faced with further consequences that only serve as a drain on the court system. Probation violations are filed, bench warrants issued, which is frankly a bazooka firing at an ant hill. What's more ridiculous, is county mental health, like some other behavioral programs here in this county, are self reporting. So, if a crazy person goes there, and as is routinely the case, feels that they are perfectly sane, they are taken at their word. Viewing it cynically (which is nearly impossible to do otherwise), it's a cost-saving tactic to prevent providing services for those who may actually benefit.
I wish I had an answer that incorporated getting help to those who needed it, and ensured that they were able to easily access those services. Other, more affluent, counties do have mental health courts, which if appropriately staffed with personnel and the right mindset, can have a profound impact. But I suppose it all depends on the almighty dollar. Hopefully, money will begin to trickle again, even in the more rural counties, and people can get the help they deserve.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Gender Normalities are Mere Formalities
Hey that rhymed!
So, with coffee and new toy in hand, I began to scan the morning headlines today, looking for nothing too deep that would make me think.
Of course, fox news is a constant source of inspiration in ridiculousness, so it is not uncommon for me to meander throughout their "journalistic integrity."
Today, I found this:
http://www.foxnews.com/health/2011/04/11/j-crew-plants-seeds-gender-identity/
So, long story short: J Crew designer is in her magazine painting her son's toes pink. PINK. PINK.
Which spurns fox news' resident "psychiatrist" to go off on what gender norms are and how fucking important they are.
They are?
Wait, are you telling me if you little boys don't wear cowboy outfits and play with guns, they may be weird?
First of all, how weird? Are we talking John Wayne Gaycie weird? Or John Waters weird? Because if it's the latter, I'll paint my hypo-kid's toes pink and put him in a sequence gown.
The article irks me for a couple of reasons. First of all, all boys kinda act a little stereotypically gay to begin with. Don't believe me? Is that offensive? I'll put my money where my 7-year-old mouth is (gross):
Pretty clear that gender norms were loosely affixed to young Patrick. And while yes, I do presently harbor a STRONG desire to become a Nikki Minaj impersonator, I also think I'm more or less normal.
Moral of the story: Fox News, stfu- let parents parent. If you're not hurting you child, and your child is happy, who the fuck are you to judge.
So, with coffee and new toy in hand, I began to scan the morning headlines today, looking for nothing too deep that would make me think.
Of course, fox news is a constant source of inspiration in ridiculousness, so it is not uncommon for me to meander throughout their "journalistic integrity."
Today, I found this:
http://www.foxnews.com/health/2011/04/11/j-crew-plants-seeds-gender-identity/
So, long story short: J Crew designer is in her magazine painting her son's toes pink. PINK. PINK.
Which spurns fox news' resident "psychiatrist" to go off on what gender norms are and how fucking important they are.
They are?
Wait, are you telling me if you little boys don't wear cowboy outfits and play with guns, they may be weird?
First of all, how weird? Are we talking John Wayne Gaycie weird? Or John Waters weird? Because if it's the latter, I'll paint my hypo-kid's toes pink and put him in a sequence gown.
The article irks me for a couple of reasons. First of all, all boys kinda act a little stereotypically gay to begin with. Don't believe me? Is that offensive? I'll put my money where my 7-year-old mouth is (gross):
Pretty clear that gender norms were loosely affixed to young Patrick. And while yes, I do presently harbor a STRONG desire to become a Nikki Minaj impersonator, I also think I'm more or less normal.
Moral of the story: Fox News, stfu- let parents parent. If you're not hurting you child, and your child is happy, who the fuck are you to judge.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Of Marshmallows and Teenage Witticisms
It doesn't take much for LLK to make a strong push for the canceled Veronica Mars. Several years ago, I took her up on her recommendation.
The recommendation delivered. And, quite honestly, it makes sense to recommend the show at any occasion.
I've been devouring the show (presently streaming on Netflix) lately, and it has progressively hit me.
This fucking show has everyone.
Rob Thomas, most recently of Party Down fame (another show canceled despite critical reception), seems to either have influential friendships, or a knack for creating shows that people what to involve themselves with. If I had to hazard a bet, I would guess it's some combination.
So, to avoid butchering the explanation of why VMars is so amazing (and it is), I'll simply point you to your Wii, blue ray player, or computer to stream that shit. But what I will do is illustrate the eerie encompassing of other shows. If you judge people by the company they keep, this list should be illustrative.
1. The "Wet Hot American Summer" contingent: The greatest movie ever, this program incorporated two actors from Wet Hot: Ken Marino, who plays the asshole detective Vinny Van Lowe, and Paul Rudd, who makes an awesome asshole guest appearance as Desmond Fellows, an "aging rocker." For anyone with taste, this should automatically clinch.
2. The "Simpsons" contingent: Dan Castelleneta, aka Homer, makes a guest cameo as the sociology professor. At one point, one of the actors exclaims "Doh!" as he walks away. Very awesome.
3. The "Home Improvement" contingent: Ok, so if you're like me, you haven't thrown away a single "Tiger Beat," especially those with JTT gracing the cover. Both JTT and ZTB have guest appearances, which induces such a strong nostalgic reaction that I'm half-tempted to reach for the nearest Boyz to Men cassette I have laying around.
4. The "Just Shoot Me" contingent: Enrico Colantani, who plays Keith Mars, obviously was in Just Shoot me. So it makes sense that they should bring the actress that played Maya in the third season.
5. The "Boy Meets World" contingent: A bit of a stretch since there's only one actor, but Rider Strong (porn name), who blessed this world as Cory's wrong-side-of-the-tracks bff Sean, resurfaces as the asshole college kid.
6. The "Freaks and Geeks" contingent: Samm Levine, who was in another too-soon canceled show, "Freaks and Geeks," graces us with his presences as Samuel Horshack, in the same episode with Strong, above.
Honorable Mentions: "Laguna Beach," "Celebrity Sex Tapes involving Heiresses."
I know I'm missing some, but I'd like to think that the above list shows that Rob Thomas keeps good company, and makes good tv that is cut down too soon.
Enjoy!
The recommendation delivered. And, quite honestly, it makes sense to recommend the show at any occasion.
I've been devouring the show (presently streaming on Netflix) lately, and it has progressively hit me.
This fucking show has everyone.
Rob Thomas, most recently of Party Down fame (another show canceled despite critical reception), seems to either have influential friendships, or a knack for creating shows that people what to involve themselves with. If I had to hazard a bet, I would guess it's some combination.
So, to avoid butchering the explanation of why VMars is so amazing (and it is), I'll simply point you to your Wii, blue ray player, or computer to stream that shit. But what I will do is illustrate the eerie encompassing of other shows. If you judge people by the company they keep, this list should be illustrative.
1. The "Wet Hot American Summer" contingent: The greatest movie ever, this program incorporated two actors from Wet Hot: Ken Marino, who plays the asshole detective Vinny Van Lowe, and Paul Rudd, who makes an awesome asshole guest appearance as Desmond Fellows, an "aging rocker." For anyone with taste, this should automatically clinch.
2. The "Simpsons" contingent: Dan Castelleneta, aka Homer, makes a guest cameo as the sociology professor. At one point, one of the actors exclaims "Doh!" as he walks away. Very awesome.
3. The "Home Improvement" contingent: Ok, so if you're like me, you haven't thrown away a single "Tiger Beat," especially those with JTT gracing the cover. Both JTT and ZTB have guest appearances, which induces such a strong nostalgic reaction that I'm half-tempted to reach for the nearest Boyz to Men cassette I have laying around.
4. The "Just Shoot Me" contingent: Enrico Colantani, who plays Keith Mars, obviously was in Just Shoot me. So it makes sense that they should bring the actress that played Maya in the third season.
5. The "Boy Meets World" contingent: A bit of a stretch since there's only one actor, but Rider Strong (porn name), who blessed this world as Cory's wrong-side-of-the-tracks bff Sean, resurfaces as the asshole college kid.
6. The "Freaks and Geeks" contingent: Samm Levine, who was in another too-soon canceled show, "Freaks and Geeks," graces us with his presences as Samuel Horshack, in the same episode with Strong, above.
Honorable Mentions: "Laguna Beach," "Celebrity Sex Tapes involving Heiresses."
I know I'm missing some, but I'd like to think that the above list shows that Rob Thomas keeps good company, and makes good tv that is cut down too soon.
Enjoy!
Friday, April 1, 2011
Cabin Fever
So, as of this morning, the following has occurred:
101 is COMPLETELY shut off south of Garberville.
299, one of two highways to get to the 5, has been plagued with rock slides.
It's created a bit of a cabin fever situation, and hopefully, as the ever wonderful (sarcasm) Times-Standard reports, 101 will be one-way traffic by Sunday at the earliest.
With that in mind, I have no recourse but to drown my sorrows in the following blooper reel:
101 is COMPLETELY shut off south of Garberville.
299, one of two highways to get to the 5, has been plagued with rock slides.
It's created a bit of a cabin fever situation, and hopefully, as the ever wonderful (sarcasm) Times-Standard reports, 101 will be one-way traffic by Sunday at the earliest.
With that in mind, I have no recourse but to drown my sorrows in the following blooper reel:
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Compassion v. Practicality
I know few public defenders that took the position just because of the money, or because it was something to do. Most, if not all, either enjoy the work, or have some degree of compassion or youthful idealism that makes even Sean Penn want to puke up that pizza he ordered in the middle of class. (Lest we forget that he was Spicoli.)
Ok, so I know this post looks like it's veering in to self-congratulatory pandering, but it's not.
All glorified social workers (which is essentially what I am), have a breaking point.
For some, it's representing someone you know is guilty, getting them sprung, only to see the same crime committed. For others, it's just the knowledge of a losing battle.
For me, it's this tweaker asshole that has currently been parked outside in our parking lot for the past 16 or so hours. It started yesterday afternoon, when I came back and saw a disheveled, scraggly, man wearing waders and a coat that I assume at some point did not smell like meth and day old cigarette butts. He was working on his car. And when I say working, I mean, hood open, and randomly pulling shit out of the engine. Shit that looked serious.
I let it go on for a while. Exchanged pleasantries. He called me "counselor," and in his little tweaker way, I thought it was kinda cute.
But it kept going until closing time.... So I go outside. "Hey," I call, "so is it not starting or anything." I thought the hint was there. "No, counselor, it's just the light." The light. The light?! Are you fucking kidding me?! So I leave, and my parting words are, verbatim, "Hey, you should just take it to a mechanic. They should be able to take care of it. You're not allowed to park here if you don't have an appointment, unfortunately." He meths back, "Loud and clear Counselor!"
Fast forward to this morning. Same fucking jalopy. Straddling two parking spots. Tweaker, wrapped like a mummy, in a leopard print fleece, sleeping in the driver's seat. As of thirty minutes ago, I have woken him up, and let him know that I will be towing said vehicle if it's not gone in 30 minutes.
Ideals be damned, parking is sacred.
Ok, so I know this post looks like it's veering in to self-congratulatory pandering, but it's not.
All glorified social workers (which is essentially what I am), have a breaking point.
For some, it's representing someone you know is guilty, getting them sprung, only to see the same crime committed. For others, it's just the knowledge of a losing battle.
For me, it's this tweaker asshole that has currently been parked outside in our parking lot for the past 16 or so hours. It started yesterday afternoon, when I came back and saw a disheveled, scraggly, man wearing waders and a coat that I assume at some point did not smell like meth and day old cigarette butts. He was working on his car. And when I say working, I mean, hood open, and randomly pulling shit out of the engine. Shit that looked serious.
I let it go on for a while. Exchanged pleasantries. He called me "counselor," and in his little tweaker way, I thought it was kinda cute.
But it kept going until closing time.... So I go outside. "Hey," I call, "so is it not starting or anything." I thought the hint was there. "No, counselor, it's just the light." The light. The light?! Are you fucking kidding me?! So I leave, and my parting words are, verbatim, "Hey, you should just take it to a mechanic. They should be able to take care of it. You're not allowed to park here if you don't have an appointment, unfortunately." He meths back, "Loud and clear Counselor!"
Fast forward to this morning. Same fucking jalopy. Straddling two parking spots. Tweaker, wrapped like a mummy, in a leopard print fleece, sleeping in the driver's seat. As of thirty minutes ago, I have woken him up, and let him know that I will be towing said vehicle if it's not gone in 30 minutes.
Ideals be damned, parking is sacred.
Monday, March 28, 2011
On Christianity
Although engaging the 320 mile journey to hang out with LLK and other friendtypes is not the ideal, I try my best to make due. (And ideally get to a point where I can call (408) and it's local.) Part of how I make due? Crazy. Christian. Talk. Radio.
Allow me to make my usual initial caveat: I like some Christians, and truthfully, there's some merit to a lot of Christ's teaching. Loving each other, giving back, etc. And some of you may be aware, during my "rebellious" years, I was a born-again myself. What can I say, it was southern orange county, and mega churches can be mega convincing...
Still, decent values aside, listening to the radio several things have becoming apparent.
1. There are a sizable faction of Christians that believe the rapture is going to occur on May 21, 2011. Seriously. There was a guy going on for HOURS on a call in show on one of the radio programs. It wasn't his message so much that shocked me. (I've met enough people with crazy conspiracy theories to not be too phased.) No, it was the volume of calls genuinely interested in how to approach the for-sure rapture. People were asking if they should get supplies, what will happen, etc.
Folks, let's get one thing clear: if Snookie has written a book and the skies haven't opened up and swallowed all of civilization, I doubt May 21 is a better time. Of course, I may be wrong, but I don't think we should all be maxing out our credit cards on May 20.
2. The whole traditional family values garbage that Christians espouse is also starting to get on my nerves. I was listening to another program where a seemingly and otherwise charismatic pastor was talking about how wives should act. At one point, he said that notwithstanding sins, wives should pretty much do whatever their husbands said. Don't worry, he strongly admonished the men to not use that to beat their wives. So that's cool, I guess.
Also- reaaaaalllly getting sick of the whole beating up on gay people thing. If it's not your (tea)bag, then fine. But you really care if a couple of homogays raise some kids? Let me tell you something. (And I've gone on this rant before.) I've been to the Castro enough (free drinks, woof.) to realize a couple of things. First, regardless of the store on the Castro, they all have gay porn displayed in their windows. Second, the dogs on the Castro are the most well-taken after dogs in the universe. Every single one. They all have beautiful coats, usually have some kind of expensive outfit on, and in some cases, I have seen a doggie yoga mat strapped to their backs. I guarantee you they eat better than I do, and probably are better educated too. So who the fuck are you to say that people that treat their dogs like kings and queens (helllloooooooo) and who WANT to have kids shouldn't? Why is it perfectly legal for two fuck-ups to have a child who will likely become a client. I know this is anecdotal, but I have had zero, ZERO, criminal defendants who were raised by same-sex couples. ZERO! Let the gays have kids for Christ's sake.
3. The whole bat-shit science thing is getting old too. Listen people, we get it, God is good, and God made dirt, and dirt don't hurt. Ok. Cool. But when empirical evidence begins to at least challenge the words in your crazy ass book, don't discount science as the tools of devil. Science, at least to what my limited knowledge permits, is the pursuit of truth. It's not in direct conflict with religion, but sometimes I get pissed when Christians discount everything science says because it's not backed by God. And then when you confront them with some empirical fact, like say, that FUCKING DINOSAURS WALKED AROUND MILLIONS OF YEARS AGO AND NOT DURING THE TIME OF MAN, they hide behind the faith argument. It goes like this:
Rational human being: So, yeah, fossils.
Krazy Khristian: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! THOSE WERE PLANTED BY THE DEVIL 30 YEARS AGO WITH THE HELP FROM BURT REYNOLDS IN A CHEVY CAMERO. JESUS RODE DINOSAURS AND WAS THE ORIGINAL EXECUTIVE PRODUCER FOR FREAKS AND GEEKS.
RHB: Um...
KK: How dare you challenge me! It's called faith, and even if something isn't true, if I believe it, then it is.
RHB: Santa Claus?
KK: Are you making fun of me?! Santa is made up to make money. Jesus died for you sins and this is how you thank him?! By thinking rationally and not relying on BLIND FAITH?!
RHB: So let me get this straight- When confronted by an inconsistency or flaw in your theology, your asked to simply believe that it's true because that's what God wants?
KK: YES!
The bottomline is that the Bible has a LOT of crazy shit in it. I'm not saying that all of it should be discounted, or written off, but if it's not perfectly and easily interpreted by one explanation, shouldn't that say something? We have so many different theologians, all Christian, who parse out different meanings for different verses. I wouldn't put a whole lot of stock in it's empirical worth.
4. Finally, getting sick of the petty judgment of nonbelievers. Christians, stop praying for me already. If you feel like you're saved, cool. But don't worry about me or other people UNLESS WE SHOW A GENUINE INTEREST. It's annoying. And don't act like you're better b/c you're "saved." I know plenty of non-christians who do nice things every day. Hell, I even know atheists who are nice. And they do it just to be nice! Get over yourself- you're not an amazing person for getting dunked in a pool. Any 2nd grader can tell you that.
Again, and finally, Christians, you're mostly cool. Jesus was a cool dude who probably was pretty rad to hang out with and ride Jesus Ponies with. But just chill out!
Allow me to make my usual initial caveat: I like some Christians, and truthfully, there's some merit to a lot of Christ's teaching. Loving each other, giving back, etc. And some of you may be aware, during my "rebellious" years, I was a born-again myself. What can I say, it was southern orange county, and mega churches can be mega convincing...
Still, decent values aside, listening to the radio several things have becoming apparent.
1. There are a sizable faction of Christians that believe the rapture is going to occur on May 21, 2011. Seriously. There was a guy going on for HOURS on a call in show on one of the radio programs. It wasn't his message so much that shocked me. (I've met enough people with crazy conspiracy theories to not be too phased.) No, it was the volume of calls genuinely interested in how to approach the for-sure rapture. People were asking if they should get supplies, what will happen, etc.
Folks, let's get one thing clear: if Snookie has written a book and the skies haven't opened up and swallowed all of civilization, I doubt May 21 is a better time. Of course, I may be wrong, but I don't think we should all be maxing out our credit cards on May 20.
2. The whole traditional family values garbage that Christians espouse is also starting to get on my nerves. I was listening to another program where a seemingly and otherwise charismatic pastor was talking about how wives should act. At one point, he said that notwithstanding sins, wives should pretty much do whatever their husbands said. Don't worry, he strongly admonished the men to not use that to beat their wives. So that's cool, I guess.
Also- reaaaaalllly getting sick of the whole beating up on gay people thing. If it's not your (tea)bag, then fine. But you really care if a couple of homogays raise some kids? Let me tell you something. (And I've gone on this rant before.) I've been to the Castro enough (free drinks, woof.) to realize a couple of things. First, regardless of the store on the Castro, they all have gay porn displayed in their windows. Second, the dogs on the Castro are the most well-taken after dogs in the universe. Every single one. They all have beautiful coats, usually have some kind of expensive outfit on, and in some cases, I have seen a doggie yoga mat strapped to their backs. I guarantee you they eat better than I do, and probably are better educated too. So who the fuck are you to say that people that treat their dogs like kings and queens (helllloooooooo) and who WANT to have kids shouldn't? Why is it perfectly legal for two fuck-ups to have a child who will likely become a client. I know this is anecdotal, but I have had zero, ZERO, criminal defendants who were raised by same-sex couples. ZERO! Let the gays have kids for Christ's sake.
3. The whole bat-shit science thing is getting old too. Listen people, we get it, God is good, and God made dirt, and dirt don't hurt. Ok. Cool. But when empirical evidence begins to at least challenge the words in your crazy ass book, don't discount science as the tools of devil. Science, at least to what my limited knowledge permits, is the pursuit of truth. It's not in direct conflict with religion, but sometimes I get pissed when Christians discount everything science says because it's not backed by God. And then when you confront them with some empirical fact, like say, that FUCKING DINOSAURS WALKED AROUND MILLIONS OF YEARS AGO AND NOT DURING THE TIME OF MAN, they hide behind the faith argument. It goes like this:
Rational human being: So, yeah, fossils.
Krazy Khristian: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! THOSE WERE PLANTED BY THE DEVIL 30 YEARS AGO WITH THE HELP FROM BURT REYNOLDS IN A CHEVY CAMERO. JESUS RODE DINOSAURS AND WAS THE ORIGINAL EXECUTIVE PRODUCER FOR FREAKS AND GEEKS.
RHB: Um...
KK: How dare you challenge me! It's called faith, and even if something isn't true, if I believe it, then it is.
RHB: Santa Claus?
KK: Are you making fun of me?! Santa is made up to make money. Jesus died for you sins and this is how you thank him?! By thinking rationally and not relying on BLIND FAITH?!
RHB: So let me get this straight- When confronted by an inconsistency or flaw in your theology, your asked to simply believe that it's true because that's what God wants?
KK: YES!
The bottomline is that the Bible has a LOT of crazy shit in it. I'm not saying that all of it should be discounted, or written off, but if it's not perfectly and easily interpreted by one explanation, shouldn't that say something? We have so many different theologians, all Christian, who parse out different meanings for different verses. I wouldn't put a whole lot of stock in it's empirical worth.
4. Finally, getting sick of the petty judgment of nonbelievers. Christians, stop praying for me already. If you feel like you're saved, cool. But don't worry about me or other people UNLESS WE SHOW A GENUINE INTEREST. It's annoying. And don't act like you're better b/c you're "saved." I know plenty of non-christians who do nice things every day. Hell, I even know atheists who are nice. And they do it just to be nice! Get over yourself- you're not an amazing person for getting dunked in a pool. Any 2nd grader can tell you that.
Again, and finally, Christians, you're mostly cool. Jesus was a cool dude who probably was pretty rad to hang out with and ride Jesus Ponies with. But just chill out!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Today's White Suburban Kid Music Picks...
Working late at the office takes on a different feel. The lights are dim, there's less embarrassment dancing and doing that stupid shoulder shake thing that I do.
Still, unencumbered by the presence of coworkers and clients, after 5 pm I can let my luscious locks down, unbutton the top button (of pants or shirt? he'll never tell...) and indulge in yet again further proof that I am a suburban white kid.
I'll be honest- I'm a sucker for good neo-soul/R&B music. The distinction between the genres is a point of contention to some, I'm sure so I won't pretend that I know the difference between soul, R&B, or any other modified genre. I'll just present what I enjoy.
E.G.,
Musiq's "Half Crazy"
What can I say? Good voice, syncopated horn lines, and just all around dope. Wish this guy was more popular.
Slum Village, featuring Dwele's "Tainted"
Granted, this isn't necessarily R&B, but Dwele's vocals and organ backing (tell me that doesn't sound dirty...)
D'Angelo's "Untitled"
There's nothing I can say that wouldn't be construed as having overt homosexual under(and possibly over)tones. So I'll just leave that video there. (If you have Victorian sensibilities like yours truly, just play the video in an other window as it's sNSFW.)
Jill Scott's "Golden"
Scott has worked on so much stuff, and is an unbelievable singer/songwriter. And, without getting too preachy, she's not "mainstream" largely due to the fact that she doesn't look like Rihanna. The thing is, though, in my opinion, if you're selling RECORDS, the focus should be on your ability. And I'm sorry, Rihanna is quite literally a 3-4 note wonder. She is talentless and the more I hear from her on the radio, the more I sympathize with Chris Brown. J/K! Kinda...
Bill Wither's "Aint no Sunshine"
Keeping things in historical perspective, I present one of the greats: Mr. Withers, with a special shot-out to the one reader who has a tendency to create the sunniest days in this god-forsaken rain forest. Withers' voice is straight-up UNbelievable and a force to be reckoned with.
Still, unencumbered by the presence of coworkers and clients, after 5 pm I can let my luscious locks down, unbutton the top button (of pants or shirt? he'll never tell...) and indulge in yet again further proof that I am a suburban white kid.
I'll be honest- I'm a sucker for good neo-soul/R&B music. The distinction between the genres is a point of contention to some, I'm sure so I won't pretend that I know the difference between soul, R&B, or any other modified genre. I'll just present what I enjoy.
E.G.,
Musiq's "Half Crazy"
What can I say? Good voice, syncopated horn lines, and just all around dope. Wish this guy was more popular.
Slum Village, featuring Dwele's "Tainted"
Granted, this isn't necessarily R&B, but Dwele's vocals and organ backing (tell me that doesn't sound dirty...)
D'Angelo's "Untitled"
There's nothing I can say that wouldn't be construed as having overt homosexual under(and possibly over)tones. So I'll just leave that video there. (If you have Victorian sensibilities like yours truly, just play the video in an other window as it's sNSFW.)
Jill Scott's "Golden"
Scott has worked on so much stuff, and is an unbelievable singer/songwriter. And, without getting too preachy, she's not "mainstream" largely due to the fact that she doesn't look like Rihanna. The thing is, though, in my opinion, if you're selling RECORDS, the focus should be on your ability. And I'm sorry, Rihanna is quite literally a 3-4 note wonder. She is talentless and the more I hear from her on the radio, the more I sympathize with Chris Brown. J/K! Kinda...
Bill Wither's "Aint no Sunshine"
Keeping things in historical perspective, I present one of the greats: Mr. Withers, with a special shot-out to the one reader who has a tendency to create the sunniest days in this god-forsaken rain forest. Withers' voice is straight-up UNbelievable and a force to be reckoned with.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Welcome Back Rant
Hey folks,
Yes it's been a while, and yes, I'm crappy for not keeping up on my promises to continue to write vigorously. I could probably try to pinpoint nine or ten lame excuses, but they'd be just that: lame and stupid.
Also, writing socially is not unlike writing professionally. It's under-emphasized, yet very important to success. Consequently, the more I write, the more confident I will be when I start doing open mics, of which I've found some up here in the 'Boldt.
So, put up the faux brick wall behind me, get me in my finest jeans and white tennis shoes with a blazer a la LLK's mother's former classmate (Seinfeld), and let's begin the rant.
What's the deeeeeeeal with natural disasters?
Ok, dropping the bad comic bit for a second. Seriously, what's the deal? Terrible? Yes. Unpredictable? Sure. Highlights the fact that George W. Bush hates black people? Definitely. Highlights the fact that George W. Bush hates midgets? Most definitely. A call to action? Yes.
Here's what natural disasters are NOT.
They are not a call to people to put up a facebook status asking me to pray for people. I'm not a devout follower of any religion, unless you count the collective works of Jon Benjamin something beyond a mere idolatry. Therefore, publicly asking for prayer makes a couple of POWERFUL assumptions:
1. I regularly pray.
2. I scan my facebook feed just hoping that people are passively asking for prayer.
3. That whatever you are asking for is worthy of my prayer.
There's a distinct difference between someone genuinely approaching me, and asking that I pray for, let's say, a loved one who is sick. In that situation, someone has put themselves out there, and has legitimate reason to seek a other-worldly alternative. And although my metaphysical views are subject to great scrutiny, I can usually muster at least some pointed thoughts for the person in that situation.
Everyone else: Go fuck yourself. No, seriously. How lazy are you that you're casting a net out there for prayers in your facebook status? I'm sorry, it's a weak attempt at best, and it's really kinda lame. It's like when your parents are hounding to find work and you half-assedly apply to like 2-3 a week on craigslist. No, this doesn't count. Sorry. Either ask me personally, or keep your prayers to yourself.
The other, and possibly bigger annoyance about the facebook response to the disaster is the fake-ass outpouring of support, usually characterized with a profile picture change, by people who have ABSOLUTELY NO CONNECTION TO THE TRAGEDY WHATSOEVER.
Let's make one thing clear- if you have family, friends, loved ones, etc., that have been directly impacted by the havoc, by all means, use whatever mechanisms you have to vent, call for action, etc.
Everyone else: STOP FRONTING. I swear, the slacktivism is really starting to get to me. I can almost guarantee that the average, work-a-day person, doesn't actually care about the tragedy. Sure, it's something to talk about when conversation with acquaintances wains, or to change the topic when the creepy guy hits on you, but outside casual knowledge, I would bet top-dollar that you're not fretting about what's going on. So stop acting like it . It's disingenuous, at best, and kinda sociopathic at worst. Reserve your passion for the things you actually care about, and you'll actually seem like a decent person.
Finally, news: Stop it. Just stop. Let the proper authorities deal with the aftermath, and stop capitalizing on the fear and emotion of tragedy. When there was the bullshit tsunami warning, I remember seeing a reporter "bravely" discussing the impending doom from the SF Bay, with the GG bridge within picturesque shot. He made it very clear that although disaster could strike at any moment, he would "bravely" be ok and that the report was worth it. OH PLEASE! Shit like that makes people freak the fuck out, and is just a total lie. Stop reporting on speculations of speculations, and actually DO SOMETHING. And yes, the reactor issue is probably a concern to those near the wreckage. BUT STOP INSINUATING THAT IF I EAT A BANANA I WILL DIE. I have enough of a hard time consuming food that is good for me without the "news" guaranteeing my diet to be twinkies and beef jerky, both of which are immune to radiation and digestion.
And please don't misread my rant as the ramblings of a jaded asshole. Look, what happened was awful and will continue to effect the lives of millions. My point is, if it doesn't effect you, and you plan to do nothing other than throw up a cursory facebook status, then just shut up. If you feel compelled to help, that's great, and guess what? You've earned the right to talk about it.
Yes it's been a while, and yes, I'm crappy for not keeping up on my promises to continue to write vigorously. I could probably try to pinpoint nine or ten lame excuses, but they'd be just that: lame and stupid.
Also, writing socially is not unlike writing professionally. It's under-emphasized, yet very important to success. Consequently, the more I write, the more confident I will be when I start doing open mics, of which I've found some up here in the 'Boldt.
So, put up the faux brick wall behind me, get me in my finest jeans and white tennis shoes with a blazer a la LLK's mother's former classmate (Seinfeld), and let's begin the rant.
What's the deeeeeeeal with natural disasters?
Ok, dropping the bad comic bit for a second. Seriously, what's the deal? Terrible? Yes. Unpredictable? Sure. Highlights the fact that George W. Bush hates black people? Definitely. Highlights the fact that George W. Bush hates midgets? Most definitely. A call to action? Yes.
Here's what natural disasters are NOT.
They are not a call to people to put up a facebook status asking me to pray for people. I'm not a devout follower of any religion, unless you count the collective works of Jon Benjamin something beyond a mere idolatry. Therefore, publicly asking for prayer makes a couple of POWERFUL assumptions:
1. I regularly pray.
2. I scan my facebook feed just hoping that people are passively asking for prayer.
3. That whatever you are asking for is worthy of my prayer.
There's a distinct difference between someone genuinely approaching me, and asking that I pray for, let's say, a loved one who is sick. In that situation, someone has put themselves out there, and has legitimate reason to seek a other-worldly alternative. And although my metaphysical views are subject to great scrutiny, I can usually muster at least some pointed thoughts for the person in that situation.
Everyone else: Go fuck yourself. No, seriously. How lazy are you that you're casting a net out there for prayers in your facebook status? I'm sorry, it's a weak attempt at best, and it's really kinda lame. It's like when your parents are hounding to find work and you half-assedly apply to like 2-3 a week on craigslist. No, this doesn't count. Sorry. Either ask me personally, or keep your prayers to yourself.
The other, and possibly bigger annoyance about the facebook response to the disaster is the fake-ass outpouring of support, usually characterized with a profile picture change, by people who have ABSOLUTELY NO CONNECTION TO THE TRAGEDY WHATSOEVER.
Let's make one thing clear- if you have family, friends, loved ones, etc., that have been directly impacted by the havoc, by all means, use whatever mechanisms you have to vent, call for action, etc.
Everyone else: STOP FRONTING. I swear, the slacktivism is really starting to get to me. I can almost guarantee that the average, work-a-day person, doesn't actually care about the tragedy. Sure, it's something to talk about when conversation with acquaintances wains, or to change the topic when the creepy guy hits on you, but outside casual knowledge, I would bet top-dollar that you're not fretting about what's going on. So stop acting like it . It's disingenuous, at best, and kinda sociopathic at worst. Reserve your passion for the things you actually care about, and you'll actually seem like a decent person.
Finally, news: Stop it. Just stop. Let the proper authorities deal with the aftermath, and stop capitalizing on the fear and emotion of tragedy. When there was the bullshit tsunami warning, I remember seeing a reporter "bravely" discussing the impending doom from the SF Bay, with the GG bridge within picturesque shot. He made it very clear that although disaster could strike at any moment, he would "bravely" be ok and that the report was worth it. OH PLEASE! Shit like that makes people freak the fuck out, and is just a total lie. Stop reporting on speculations of speculations, and actually DO SOMETHING. And yes, the reactor issue is probably a concern to those near the wreckage. BUT STOP INSINUATING THAT IF I EAT A BANANA I WILL DIE. I have enough of a hard time consuming food that is good for me without the "news" guaranteeing my diet to be twinkies and beef jerky, both of which are immune to radiation and digestion.
And please don't misread my rant as the ramblings of a jaded asshole. Look, what happened was awful and will continue to effect the lives of millions. My point is, if it doesn't effect you, and you plan to do nothing other than throw up a cursory facebook status, then just shut up. If you feel compelled to help, that's great, and guess what? You've earned the right to talk about it.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Update Regarding the Previous Ke$ha Post
1. Press Control + T in your browser. (If this does not work in your browser, you don't deserve to see this.)
2. Get to youtube.
3. Type in "terrible music" in to the search bar.
4. Enjoy.
5. ????
6. Profit.
2. Get to youtube.
3. Type in "terrible music" in to the search bar.
4. Enjoy.
5. ????
6. Profit.
This Week's "What I'm Listening To"
If you've read enough of my posts, I'm sure you could surmise that my upbringing is one of a white middle class, privileged, semi-charmed kind of life. (doot doot dooooot!)
And given that fact, you likely could make the logical leap that as a white middle class kid, I love teh hip hops.
And although I do fall quite readily in to that stereotype, I can confidently say that I'm not the kind of white guy that:
1. Turns down his hip hops while driving in an "urban" area.
2. Overly acts like Seth Green in "Can't Hardly Wait," although I have been considering incorporating more goggles in to my wardrobe. (Sorry, LLK!)
So with the above in mind, I am happy to announce and defend the album that I am currently obsessed with:
De La Soul's 4th full album, first debuted in 1996, "Stakes is High." (Repping Strong Island, LLK!)
And again, understand that I love a lot of hip hop, and it ranges across the board. So when I say that this album has recently become one of my top 5 in the genre, I'd like to think it means something.
The reasons:
- It's complete and diverse, featuring a lot of different guest emcees, and although there's a definite stylistic cohesion, its songs play around within their parameters without losing the listener.
- It has genuine lyricism, avoiding cliche rap things. And it's not preachy, either. It's well-written, simple as that.
- It's one of the few albums that features 17 tracks that doesn't get old or feel phoned in at all.
My preferred tracks:
-Dinninit
-Supa Emcees
-Sunshine (arguably my favorite track)
-Dog Eat Dog
-Brakes
-Stakes is High
Bottomline: If you don't like this kind of music, I think this album is worth a listen to try and change your mind. If you do, I think it would be much appreciated.
Enjoy your ides of February, everyone!
And given that fact, you likely could make the logical leap that as a white middle class kid, I love teh hip hops.
And although I do fall quite readily in to that stereotype, I can confidently say that I'm not the kind of white guy that:
1. Turns down his hip hops while driving in an "urban" area.
2. Overly acts like Seth Green in "Can't Hardly Wait," although I have been considering incorporating more goggles in to my wardrobe. (Sorry, LLK!)
So with the above in mind, I am happy to announce and defend the album that I am currently obsessed with:
De La Soul's 4th full album, first debuted in 1996, "Stakes is High." (Repping Strong Island, LLK!)
And again, understand that I love a lot of hip hop, and it ranges across the board. So when I say that this album has recently become one of my top 5 in the genre, I'd like to think it means something.
The reasons:
- It's complete and diverse, featuring a lot of different guest emcees, and although there's a definite stylistic cohesion, its songs play around within their parameters without losing the listener.
- It has genuine lyricism, avoiding cliche rap things. And it's not preachy, either. It's well-written, simple as that.
- It's one of the few albums that features 17 tracks that doesn't get old or feel phoned in at all.
My preferred tracks:
-Dinninit
-Supa Emcees
-Sunshine (arguably my favorite track)
-Dog Eat Dog
-Brakes
-Stakes is High
Bottomline: If you don't like this kind of music, I think this album is worth a listen to try and change your mind. If you do, I think it would be much appreciated.
Enjoy your ides of February, everyone!
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Two Post Day!!!!!! Topic Two- Copyright Law
So, I'm still in the office doing actual work that requires writing stuff. Which invariably means I'm going to find any and all means to distract myself.
Awesome tumblrs certainly help. (Courtesy of LLK, and her top-notch ability to find awesome things on the interwebz.)
The other thing nagging me presently is how I believe Ke$ha is blatantly infringing on a song that I have been enjoying as of late.
First, partake in J.U.S.T.I.C.E.'s The Party (which I feel is a quite awesome song, thank you very much):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbN5B93mpFE
Compare with:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iP6XpLQM2Cs&feature=artistob&playnext=1&list=TLsGHXmmoSTLc
Give me your thoughts!
Awesome tumblrs certainly help. (Courtesy of LLK, and her top-notch ability to find awesome things on the interwebz.)
The other thing nagging me presently is how I believe Ke$ha is blatantly infringing on a song that I have been enjoying as of late.
First, partake in J.U.S.T.I.C.E.'s The Party (which I feel is a quite awesome song, thank you very much):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbN5B93mpFE
Compare with:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iP6XpLQM2Cs&feature=artistob&playnext=1&list=TLsGHXmmoSTLc
Give me your thoughts!
This Week's "Ripped from the Headlines"
Well, I know I've gone there before, but since she's an absolute gold mine, let's get our pickaxes, pans for panhandling and indulge in some more nuggets.
Here's the latest nugget.
Felony complaint for Winona'ing (stolen from LLK) a necklace from a high end LA store, allegedly.
Lo lo remains on her own recognizance, which means out on her own to do coke, but apparently it has been with a "stern" warning to not violate probation or the terms of her probation while out on OR.
So, Lo Lo is now looking like a lot of my clients- multiple files, new stuff while they're on probation, etc.
The only stark difference (and the one that pisses me off): I CAN'T THINK OF ANY CLIENT OF MINE, SIMILARLY SITUATED IN TERMS OF THEIR CRIMINAL CONDUCT, THAT WOULD BE ALLOWED TO STAY OUT ON THEIR OWN RECOGNIZANCE.
Allow me to hoist myself on to my soapbox. It's more or less a given the the more money you have, the more likely you are to be able to stay out of custody. And the more likely you are to stay out of custody, the more likely you are to be able to fight, and maybe even beat some or all of the charges. The logical deduction, then, is that money affords a criminal defendant to better off than someone who is indigent. Which, I can tell you, by way of anecdote, is more or less true. I've seen people in custody plead guilty just to get out of custody, even though they had extremely defensible cases. Sadly, a Lindsay Lohan would be in a much better position to bail out, and then fight the case.
And I guess that's what really bugs me at the core of this new case. She will probably be able to kick it down the road enough, make amends (with $$$) to the store, and eventually get the charge reduced to a misdemeanor, and get a slap on the wrist. And to me, it's almost all because she has money.
I'm not saying that people shouldn't be held accountable for their actions either, especially when they've admitted guilt. I guess I feel like if we really want to be convinced that our system is fair and balanced, all criminal defendants need to be treated equal, regardless of wealth.
My $.02.
Enjoy your weekend everyone!
Here's the latest nugget.
Felony complaint for Winona'ing (stolen from LLK) a necklace from a high end LA store, allegedly.
Lo lo remains on her own recognizance, which means out on her own to do coke, but apparently it has been with a "stern" warning to not violate probation or the terms of her probation while out on OR.
So, Lo Lo is now looking like a lot of my clients- multiple files, new stuff while they're on probation, etc.
The only stark difference (and the one that pisses me off): I CAN'T THINK OF ANY CLIENT OF MINE, SIMILARLY SITUATED IN TERMS OF THEIR CRIMINAL CONDUCT, THAT WOULD BE ALLOWED TO STAY OUT ON THEIR OWN RECOGNIZANCE.
Allow me to hoist myself on to my soapbox. It's more or less a given the the more money you have, the more likely you are to be able to stay out of custody. And the more likely you are to stay out of custody, the more likely you are to be able to fight, and maybe even beat some or all of the charges. The logical deduction, then, is that money affords a criminal defendant to better off than someone who is indigent. Which, I can tell you, by way of anecdote, is more or less true. I've seen people in custody plead guilty just to get out of custody, even though they had extremely defensible cases. Sadly, a Lindsay Lohan would be in a much better position to bail out, and then fight the case.
And I guess that's what really bugs me at the core of this new case. She will probably be able to kick it down the road enough, make amends (with $$$) to the store, and eventually get the charge reduced to a misdemeanor, and get a slap on the wrist. And to me, it's almost all because she has money.
I'm not saying that people shouldn't be held accountable for their actions either, especially when they've admitted guilt. I guess I feel like if we really want to be convinced that our system is fair and balanced, all criminal defendants need to be treated equal, regardless of wealth.
My $.02.
Enjoy your weekend everyone!
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Insert Tom Petty Quote Here
Although I feel a number of TP songs describe my life, this one nails it for how I presently am feeling.
Why?
The jury is out, and has been deliberating for two hours now. It's like taking a final- you prep, study (or in my undergraduate case, do nothing because my major was a joke), stress, get pissed off when you sit down and see that someone has written "While you were studying for your final we were shrooming," and then endure the test. You do everything you can, and then it's completely out of your hands.
There's nothing left I can do for this trial and it's frankly rather irritating, because like anything, you always feel like there's more you could have done. Still, I'm relieved that for the first time in 3 weeks I've been able to be in my office at 10:41 and actually work on things that are more manageable and not so much of a drain on my soul.
For example, today I got to call and berate AT&T for stealing 175 dollars from me. Long story short, I was apparently under contract without knowing it and when I stopped service I got dinged for the cancellation fee. Asking myself WWLLKD, I called up billing and gave them a piece of my mind and threatened legal action no less than 7 times. (At one point I intimated that I work in criminal law and know that for a fact that their actions constituted several violations of state and federal law and just by talking to me they were at risk for criminal sanctions.) This was two weeks ago, and after the lengthy discussion I was assured that the money would be returned to my account within 48 hours.
Flash forward to today. Upon review of my ever-voluptuous checking account, I was surprised to see that there was a shockingly absent 175 dollars from my friendly neighborhood evil company. So I call. I explain that I was guaranteed the money to be returned, and that I was getting progressively more upset. They did not care too much so I talked to the supervisor, who played the whole "I'm as high up as you're going to get card" as he explained that THE REFUND WAS SUBJECT TO REVIEW BY CORPORATE AND WAS DENIED.
Frustrated, but not deterred, I found corporate's number and shot for the top- THE PRESIDENT OF AT&T. Seriously, I was put through to the office. Granted I talked to someone probably much lower, but I'm happy to say that as of 2/9/11, at 10:48 a.m., I have been assured, by the PRESIDENT (of AT&T) that I"M GETTING MY MONEY BACK.
I realize that this story is kinda boring, but it's an exercise in keeping my mind off my jury and wondering what the hell they're talking about.
Also, a Contra Sweater.
Why?
The jury is out, and has been deliberating for two hours now. It's like taking a final- you prep, study (or in my undergraduate case, do nothing because my major was a joke), stress, get pissed off when you sit down and see that someone has written "While you were studying for your final we were shrooming," and then endure the test. You do everything you can, and then it's completely out of your hands.
There's nothing left I can do for this trial and it's frankly rather irritating, because like anything, you always feel like there's more you could have done. Still, I'm relieved that for the first time in 3 weeks I've been able to be in my office at 10:41 and actually work on things that are more manageable and not so much of a drain on my soul.
For example, today I got to call and berate AT&T for stealing 175 dollars from me. Long story short, I was apparently under contract without knowing it and when I stopped service I got dinged for the cancellation fee. Asking myself WWLLKD, I called up billing and gave them a piece of my mind and threatened legal action no less than 7 times. (At one point I intimated that I work in criminal law and know that for a fact that their actions constituted several violations of state and federal law and just by talking to me they were at risk for criminal sanctions.) This was two weeks ago, and after the lengthy discussion I was assured that the money would be returned to my account within 48 hours.
Flash forward to today. Upon review of my ever-voluptuous checking account, I was surprised to see that there was a shockingly absent 175 dollars from my friendly neighborhood evil company. So I call. I explain that I was guaranteed the money to be returned, and that I was getting progressively more upset. They did not care too much so I talked to the supervisor, who played the whole "I'm as high up as you're going to get card" as he explained that THE REFUND WAS SUBJECT TO REVIEW BY CORPORATE AND WAS DENIED.
Frustrated, but not deterred, I found corporate's number and shot for the top- THE PRESIDENT OF AT&T. Seriously, I was put through to the office. Granted I talked to someone probably much lower, but I'm happy to say that as of 2/9/11, at 10:48 a.m., I have been assured, by the PRESIDENT (of AT&T) that I"M GETTING MY MONEY BACK.
I realize that this story is kinda boring, but it's an exercise in keeping my mind off my jury and wondering what the hell they're talking about.
Also, a Contra Sweater.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
This Week's "I Hate You and Here's Why"
This week's recipient of a large dose of Hatorade goes to.....
THE ENTIRE STATE OF PENNSYLVANIA.
I realize that my social security number begins with a "1." (Have it, would-be identity thieves, you are more than welcome to my student loan debt!)
I realize that I have fambily (sorry LLK, I can't resist a good RHWoNJ reference when it's there for the taking) that resides in the state. I realize that they put up w/ my west coast shennagians, including getting queen sized mattresses flung at them.
I realize that despite my sports hipsterdom (Go San Jose Sabercats, my new "pro" football team!), I still love the Philadelphia Eagles.
Hell, how can you hate a state that gives you Peeps, Mike and Ikes, TastyKakes, Cheesesteaks, Scrapple, Shoe-Fly Pie, Heinz Ketchup (the preferred ketchup of professional QB's who are also rapers), Snyders Pretzels, Utz, Crayola, LLK, Yuengling, and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia?
Here's how.
So, if you feel that the above link is "tl" and you "dr," allow me to quickly sum it up: 11 year old kid is alleged to have popped his pop's new boo, and the court is not allowing him to be tried as a kid because he refuses to be sorry.
And here's the lovely part: HE REFUSES TO BE SORRY BECAUSE HE ASSERTS HE DIDN'T DO IT.
And here's a lovely little gems that is presently accompanying my Hatorade- the proverbial umbrella in the drink, if you will:
Pa tries more kids as adults than ANY OTHER STATE COMBINED.
Also, US as a total doesn't get too much of a vote of confidence either. According to the article, "The US is the only country where juveniles are serving life imprisonment without parole under the so-called 'life means life' policy. Only the US and Somalia have refused to ratify the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, which rules out life sentences with no chance of release for crimes committed before the age of 18."
Well, the pirate lifestyle is certainly a hip market right now, so why the hell join up on Somalia on other issues too, like FUCKING PUTTING CHILDREN AWAY FOR EVER.
And before you get all, "Well these are monsters and need to be taken away," allow me to simply remind you to shut the fuck up, and ask if you've ever spent life behind bars for a decision you may have made while YOUR BRAIN HASN'T FULLY DEVELOPED YET.
If it seems like I'm a bit seething, it's because I am. And I believe I'm justified- the juevenile delinquency deputy here, who is lovely and cusses like a sailor, got teary about this case and STOPPED CUSSING FOR A FEW MOMENTS. If you knew her propensity for the profane, your jaw would be dropped presently.
So, Pa, here's how you make it up to me:
Stop fucking around with juveniles like yesterday.
Wider distribution of Yuengling.
Some butterscotch Krimpets, plz.
Win a fucking super bowl with a dog killer INSTEAD of a raper, please.
Get rid of Cole Hamels- I don't like his face.
Instead of having the 76ers play home games, just show the video clip of Allen Iverson crossing over Jordan and making him look silly on loop. I would pay 30 dollars to watch that played over and over again.
Bring back Veterans stadium (I realize that this are mostly sports and food requests.)
Bring back the slogan "you've got a friend in pa." That shit was folksy as fuck, and I have several friends in Pa. So do other people. So, yeah.
Um... re do Rocky IV. Yes, IV.
THE ENTIRE STATE OF PENNSYLVANIA.
I realize that my social security number begins with a "1." (Have it, would-be identity thieves, you are more than welcome to my student loan debt!)
I realize that I have fambily (sorry LLK, I can't resist a good RHWoNJ reference when it's there for the taking) that resides in the state. I realize that they put up w/ my west coast shennagians, including getting queen sized mattresses flung at them.
I realize that despite my sports hipsterdom (Go San Jose Sabercats, my new "pro" football team!), I still love the Philadelphia Eagles.
Hell, how can you hate a state that gives you Peeps, Mike and Ikes, TastyKakes, Cheesesteaks, Scrapple, Shoe-Fly Pie, Heinz Ketchup (the preferred ketchup of professional QB's who are also rapers), Snyders Pretzels, Utz, Crayola, LLK, Yuengling, and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia?
Here's how.
So, if you feel that the above link is "tl" and you "dr," allow me to quickly sum it up: 11 year old kid is alleged to have popped his pop's new boo, and the court is not allowing him to be tried as a kid because he refuses to be sorry.
And here's the lovely part: HE REFUSES TO BE SORRY BECAUSE HE ASSERTS HE DIDN'T DO IT.
And here's a lovely little gems that is presently accompanying my Hatorade- the proverbial umbrella in the drink, if you will:
Pa tries more kids as adults than ANY OTHER STATE COMBINED.
Also, US as a total doesn't get too much of a vote of confidence either. According to the article, "The US is the only country where juveniles are serving life imprisonment without parole under the so-called 'life means life' policy. Only the US and Somalia have refused to ratify the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, which rules out life sentences with no chance of release for crimes committed before the age of 18."
Well, the pirate lifestyle is certainly a hip market right now, so why the hell join up on Somalia on other issues too, like FUCKING PUTTING CHILDREN AWAY FOR EVER.
And before you get all, "Well these are monsters and need to be taken away," allow me to simply remind you to shut the fuck up, and ask if you've ever spent life behind bars for a decision you may have made while YOUR BRAIN HASN'T FULLY DEVELOPED YET.
If it seems like I'm a bit seething, it's because I am. And I believe I'm justified- the juevenile delinquency deputy here, who is lovely and cusses like a sailor, got teary about this case and STOPPED CUSSING FOR A FEW MOMENTS. If you knew her propensity for the profane, your jaw would be dropped presently.
So, Pa, here's how you make it up to me:
Stop fucking around with juveniles like yesterday.
Wider distribution of Yuengling.
Some butterscotch Krimpets, plz.
Win a fucking super bowl with a dog killer INSTEAD of a raper, please.
Get rid of Cole Hamels- I don't like his face.
Instead of having the 76ers play home games, just show the video clip of Allen Iverson crossing over Jordan and making him look silly on loop. I would pay 30 dollars to watch that played over and over again.
Bring back Veterans stadium (I realize that this are mostly sports and food requests.)
Bring back the slogan "you've got a friend in pa." That shit was folksy as fuck, and I have several friends in Pa. So do other people. So, yeah.
Um... re do Rocky IV. Yes, IV.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
New Year's Resolution #3568
Be more creative with my litigation.
I'm not saying I'm going to file a similar motion, but sometimes I feel like this would work out a lot of things w/ opposing counsel....
Motion for a Fist Fight
Postscript: Sorry for the hiatus, gang- 2011, which has been indicated to be "straight cash homie," will prove to be packed to the brim with entries. Ideas include:
Wednesday Weigh-Ins
I hate you and here's why
Watch this video b/c I'm lazy
Descriptions of fun events participated in with my favorite reader
STRAIGHT. CASH. HOMIE.
I'm not saying I'm going to file a similar motion, but sometimes I feel like this would work out a lot of things w/ opposing counsel....
Motion for a Fist Fight
Postscript: Sorry for the hiatus, gang- 2011, which has been indicated to be "straight cash homie," will prove to be packed to the brim with entries. Ideas include:
Wednesday Weigh-Ins
I hate you and here's why
Watch this video b/c I'm lazy
Descriptions of fun events participated in with my favorite reader
STRAIGHT. CASH. HOMIE.
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